sadness

When you wake up in the morning what do you think first ??? Well me when i wake up i sometimes pray first or i just think what or how is my day going to be today. I have so much good and bad memories i think sometimes. When i look in the mirror i just look at my self and think "gosh is this me" or "wow look at me now" or something like i just want to turn around and go back the way my life was before. Inside me i have so much pain and so much struggles I'm going through. I made so much mistakes that i just wish i never did them. Even now i do still make mistakes i say something wrong or i make my parents mad or maybe disappointed or i make my friends disappointed i just don't get it why do i do this or why its me. So sometimes i think how come some people you look at them and say wow their life is so nice or wow their life is so easy. I think how come i have this complicated life or how come i have this problem. Or sometimes i think what i ever did to them to this people or why i feel like they don't want to be my friends. i don't know i just feel really down lately and i want to cry so much but im trying to be strong.

I just want to tell you that this couple of days i had alot of thinking to do. I have alot on my mind like for example, like what I'm going to do with my baby and what I'm going to do with life. this days i feel really down and i don't know what to do.